Hell is a Ferry.



I did another show with Whole Hog Theatre Company which we took to the Isle of Man Festival and my fuck we had a journey. I am going to list because this shit is insane (‘we’ in this stands for the 12 of us in a cast of 14):

  1. We left on Good Friday, got caught in traffic and missed the 2.15pm ferry by like 15 minutes.
  2. We were able to transfer our tickets to the next ferry…at 2.15am…we had to be in the theatre on the Saturday by 10am to do our tech/dress stuff to perform at 7pm. Not perfect but okay. We resigned ourselves to spending 12 hours in Morecambe.
  3. The 2.15am ferry is cancelled, no reason given.
  4. Find out there is a ferry going from Liverpool at 11.15am on Saturday, shorter distance so will get us there at about 1.30pm/2pm. We stay overnight outside Liverpool in a hotel.
  5. It gets delayed till 12.30pm.
  6. Delayed till 1.30pm.
  7. Get there at about 4.30pm and in full dress at theatre by 5.30pm top and tailing scenes as we have no time to do a full run.
  8. Show is going good until an actor misses out an entire scene…not ideal but we endeavour.
  9. it ends and the adjudicator rips us to shit a bit (I was funny but not loud enough which would have been sorted if we had a dress but heyho I should have been on it better).
  10. We all want to go home so on Sunday we book a ferry home at 3.15pm, we book in at about 1.45pmish we are on it!
  11. Ferry is delayed for a while but we get on at about 4.30pm but go nowhere. The ferry is cancelled at 5pm and we are asked to vacate the ferry. I am close to tears at this point.
  12. There is a ferry at 7.45pm that is going to Heysham(?) that we can transfer our tickets to with a coach link to Liverpool where our cars are. We get on it and go on time and get £6 off meals, I won an UNO tournament and a Monopoly tournament. I AM A GAME GOD
  13. 30 minutes from the dock and we can’t dock because fog is obscuring the lights  we must wait till 1am (it is 11.30pm now) for high tide or whatever to dock. One thing I learnt is there is no shame in sleeping on the floor of a ferry.
  14. Get into port, pick up bags, get on coach for an hour and a half to Liverpool, find car and the drive home starts at 3.30am but I don’t hit the sack till 7.30pm.

Didn’t even spend twenty-four hours on the Isle of Man. To be fair the theatre staff at the Gaiety Theatre were amazing and helped the two cast members there do everything and we loved and thank them. I did get to perform on a beautiful stage though my computer is being a twit so you will just have to Google it but it will be worth it, trust me 🙂

So I am back with a bang or a broken down ferry whichever way you like it but hey I should be getting up to date soon with my LAMDA Foundation Diploma audition and the like.

Speak soon 🙂

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